To be a lonely girl.

So Zack has gone away for a week to work. Yes, good, work = money but, that means that I am left here in this big cold apartment all alone. I hate being alone. I hate it more than anything. I am alone because I have a job here and his job is there (there being Springville) and although I only work three days this week, they are days that make it impossible to just drive all the way from Springville to work them.

My past experiences of being alone have never been good. I tend to have a really hard time, starting right off the bat...yes, minute one. I don't think that it's because I'm afraid or scared of what being alone is, I think that it is because I don't like knowing that I am alone. Weird.

I feel as if the whole being alone thing is just another process. I am left alone, then I go for the movies and the popcorn. So far I've watched two movies and it's just 1 am, which for me is like 1 pm - due to my work schedule of graveyards. I hate that one single thing of being a nurse.

In my whole 8 hours since Zack left, I have realized how much I truly do need Zack around. It's more of just knowing that he is there...even when I know he would much rather be somewhere else doing something else. He has a way of making my apartment more like a home that will one day be filled with little Zack's running around for me to look after. He just completes the puzzle, you know?

So now for another movie. Which one, Harry Potter or Beautician and the Beast?

Newly Weds and Easter Sunday

"Just wanted to inform you all that these two are so meant.

Allie=dancing, twirling, dreaming, hoping, loving, laughing sort of girl.

Zack=thinking, working, creating, experimenting, laughing sort of guy.

It only takes a moment to see how much they love each other. Every day, a kind word, a kiss. In our family, we believe in love and in luck. May every day be filled with both."

This lovely quote was written by my ever endearing and remarkable little sister Becca, just after Zack and I got engaged. I know it's old news but I found it and had to share her beautiful way with words. She is the most adorable and sweet sister...not saying that my older sis Britt isn't, but Bee just has that something. She is the sister with whom I had to share almost everything with as a child in our room and with whom I have grown much accustomed to as being a very best friend. I love her and all our memories...good and bad. Sisters make life easier to go through. I don't know where I would be without her and Britt. If not for them and a select few others (Jenna, Jackie, Jacqui, Jess), I would not be married now. They helped me through waiting and the pain of secret fears of being "left at the altar" and any other wedding mishaps that happen to find their way into a blushing, crying brides mind. Thanks Guys!!!

Holy Swine Flu!!!

Yeah it's true...I don't have Swine Flu. Sorry for the inconvenience. I'm not contagious but I am seriously considering suing the freak who made me get the immunization that...yep, you guessed it, didn't do it's job! Arghhhh!

On a better note. I had the freaking best time at the mall yesterday with Zack and our friends, Truxton, Megan and Brigdette. Megan and I watched our husbands faces light up as they got their dream presents and cracked up at Bridgette running around. Brigde, my new little bestest friend, only came to me. It was kinda funny, she would bypass her dad completely and come right to me. I have a feeling, though, that her opinion might change. Who knows, I am just the new face right now, that will change one day.

As for Christmas being right around the corner, I can't wait to spend time with family and friends! I also can't wait to see the way Zack will ineveitably light up when he opens that one present he doesn't know about. Hahaha! I do have one thing on him! Finally, he isn't the only one with secrets!

Hope you all get to stay away from the dreaded Swine Flu!

Oh 'Tis the Season!

Wow is it December already? Holy Cow! Time flies and I must say that when I realized that I had been married for more than three months I about freaked out! When did September and October just fly by...not to mention November? Didn't we just celebrate Thanksgiving? Now it feels as if I am getting old when I know that in all reality I am so not!!! 21 is not old and I wish I could be 21 forever! Ok, so not really...but it would be nice.

So anyway, I am really excited to have it just be Christmas. There is something about this time of year that makes me really happy. I love the lights, the smells, the snow...all of it. Most of all I love that I can spend the Holiday with my family and celebrate Christ's birth. It really is a great time of year and a wonderful way to just be happy all the time.

As I think back on Christmas' past I have so many fond memories but this year I am extremely excited to have my first married Christmas! It means so much more this year because this year I get to start my own family traditions with Zack and we can see how they might really play out with our future children. It might work...it might not. I guess we shall see.

I really hope that all of you have a wonderful Christmas season and are blessed with all that your hearts may desire.